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See it say it let it in

I work all the time. I am talented, funny, consistent, and deserving. My hustle has brought me fantastic success. I enjoy who I am and what I do. I am in love. It gives me great pleasure to live this dream.

Love in Los Angeles

Ladies and Gentlemen, Heather

Don’t Look Now, but I think….

I think I am getting a fan base. In a world of fast paced social media and hit singles with no follow up and youtube videos that make stars, I have went back to basics. Brick by brick, one fan at a time, I have built and continue to build a fan base.  This is from handing out CD’s, playing every show possible, staying after and taking pictures, signing, speaking to anyone who wants to. I also respond to all my fans.

I learned a lot of it from Dane Cook. I learned a lot of it from REM and believe it or not, emcee Hammer. Just get your stuff out there. We are nothing without the people that are kind enough to let us perform for them.

Right now, the Chris Army is the size of a sleeper cell, but it’s growing. Slowly, but upward.  I really can only thank you kids.

Today, Chattanooga. Tomorrow, the world

 

J CN

 

 

 

Highway Runs…

I am in my hotel in Tampa, FL and I have some Chicago on my brain and some Tampa and some wherever else I have been. I find that on this tour, my closest friends are strangers and temporary passers by. It’s so hard to maintain any kind of friendship or relationship with anyone back in the real world because I give everything I have to not getting sick, driving, exercising, writing, sleeping, flying, the pre show, the show, the post show… whatever. When I do touch base, I am so over the top thankful to be talking or texting anyone that I spook them or scare them away with my intensity. Out on the road I’m a killer, juggler, thief, con man, hobo, wizard, showman and journeymen. Married to many and loved by none.

Thank you to @jaydaviscomedy for his help and to @nickybernal for their support.

 

It’s weird. Being alone as I am, sometimes makes me want to be alone. Or with people, so I can hide. This life creates social awkwardness. It’s like a rocket, that you own and operate, but it also owns and operates you.

I have to shower.  Many the miles ahead.

Downtown Publications article by Hayley Beitman

Long before musical comedian J Chris Newberg was writing songs for American Idol and touring with Dane Cook, the Bloomfield Hills native was a quiet and reserved student at Brother Rice High School.

Newberg was a bookworm, thespian and even homecoming king, but was never the class clown. Although he never strived to be the center of attention, it was apparent that Newberg had a natural ability to find humor in everyday situations.

It wasn’t long before he ditched the road to academia and ventured onto the stage for open mic night at Mark Ridley’s Comedy Castle. “I sucked. I didn’t know how to do it,” he said.

Unaware that he was actually doing it right, his first unsuccessful time on stage was humorous in itself. “If there are two people on stage and one wins and one loses, who’s funnier? Ultimately you want success, but it’s difficult to walk on stage and connect with the audience if you come off as perfect.”

Practicing and improving the learned talent of stand-up comedy, Newberg enjoyed sharing his dose of medicinal laughter and giving everyone a chance to unwind, including himself.

“It’s a pretty simple job to make people laugh immediately. Very few jobs are that single themed. You show up at 8:00, and at 8:01 when the lights go down, you have to be funny,” he said.

Everyday occurrences spark inspiration for his edgy and witty humor, which is why he uses Twitter as a drawing board for constant exploration.

“It’s like being on a blind date with 200 people every time you go on stage. One-third of them will probably hate you, one-third will probably love you, and one-third will be indifferent. If you go after hate or indifferent, you’ll lose everyone. You have to go up knowing most of the audience won’t like you.”

The unlimited power and potential in that moment are what motivate Newberg to succeed on stage. “If you have a good day at work, you could find a fortune in fame.” Which is exactly how he got involved with Last Comic Standing, America’s Got Talent, Jimmy Kimmel Live and the Tonight Show, just to name a few.

Of all of his many accomplishments, he is most proud to be one of a few who have written an original composition for American Idol. Having also toured with the Counting Crows, Oasis, and John Mellencamp, he briefly considered the music industry instead of comedy but stuck with his original passion. “Music’s fun, but I’m way better at listening to it than I am at playing it.”

Since gaining popularity, Newberg said he has been a “workaholic gypsy,” but would eventually love to get married and raise a family in Michigan. “Every girl wants a guy with a sense of humor, but no girl says she wants to date a comic.”

Though he currently resides in Los Angeles, the musical comedian, who lived in Oakland County for 36 years and once donned a “248” decal on his guitar, still calls the mitten his home. He finds time to visit Birmingham at least once or twice a year but unless he’s working, it’s unlikely you’ll find him at a bar or club on his downtime.

In the future he hopes to become more widely recognized than he is now, and since he’s currently working on three shows with Howie Mandel, his dreams may just come true.

Black People. Movies. Bad Idea Tour Live

Review from the Road

Music and laughter rang throughout the room on Thursday night as guitar-holding comedian J. Chris Newbergperformed at the SAC 9:09 Comedy Series in Watkins Auditorium.

A Birmingham, Michigan, resident, Newberg was the first comedian in this year’s line-up of the comedy series.

Although Newberg was late due to a flight delay, he came in with a punch.  The jokes he dished out produced side-splitting and hunched-over-and-can’t-breathe kind of laughter that livened up the auditorium.

“He had a dry sense of humor, but he was witty with it,” said junior International Business major Kayla Thomas.

Newberg’s style of comedy is targeted toward adults with his category of jokes, as he called out, being a blend of clean, dirty, smart, controversial and witty. His style was unique, unexpected and modern with jokes like, “It is safe to say that Rosa Parks was undefeated at musical chairs.”

“I liked him; he was funny,” said senior French major Ethan Hoffman.

Newberg has been featured on season six of America’s Got Talent, Comedy Central, The Tonight Show, Last Comic Standing and Jimmy Kimmel Live. He has toured with stand-up comedian and film actor Dane Cook. Many known comedians have even used his original jokes like Late Night with David Letterman, Chelsea Lately and The Conan O’Brien Show.

Newberg is getting more and more recognition with his Twitter page, T-shirts, CDs, and Facebook. He is currently developing a show for NBC with “Deal or No Deal’s” Howie Mandel.

Wow…

Carolina, Had some disturbingly hot girls. Too bad, I had zero time to do anything other than window shop. Who are we kidding, I know that I joke and talk about sex constantly, but the last fucking thing I wanna do is get the herp from some townie. Sorry, Old guy kicking in.

Side note: I need to get laid.

Sider Note: Not by some townie…

And so it is. John Campanelli was out with me last week and he helped with driving and cold opens and did a great job. We joked, we laughed and did a lot of nothing other than late night driving, day sleeping, talking and connecting with strangers. Last night after the show in NC, we drove 577 miles to New Jersey.  I flew to Maryland where I am now… Waiting to go back to Michigan. Lansing tonight and Tomorrow and Saturday with a college show at Albion. Because I love you, I can tell you.. I need to shower. I need to do laundry. It’s gross.

Siderer note. I hate kids. Stop fucking looking at me. I am writing my blog that 3 of you will read.

Okay one hour and fifty minutes to kill before I fly again. I also stole a pillow from the Holiday Inn in somewhere. I also need to feel.  I am tired. I am not complaining, just sharing.

Be careful what you wish for. I have come to learn that in this entertainment business, no one cool gives a fuck about you because they are worried about maintaining their own blessing and streak of luck. So, do what I did, bring it to the people.

Like the movie, Red Dawn. They were small, but mighty and hey who knew Charlie Sheen would end up having more money than the Russians? I’ll tell you who, Charlie did. Hope is for suckers. Make your own way. And watch some get out of it and hopefully, many hop on.

 

I want love. I will find it. I want the world. I will have it. I want The Kid Rock song Picture minus all the bullshit. I simply want a good girl to miss me.  Thought I had it. Didn’t- Oh well, Onward and upward

 

I want a cookie.  BUT NOT FROM A TOWNIE!!!  What is wrong with you people?!

 

 

In My Mind I’m Going To Carolina

As luck would have it, I rocked out Virginia, Elon NC and Then Virginia and was lucky enough to get a day off. My opener John and I decided to spend it in Charleston, SC. This my friends, is one of the prettiest places on earth. Not because of all the water, but because of the women. Holy Frogs does that town have some pretty faces.  We watched the Lions get slammed by the 9ers and then trolled the town that smelled like horse poop and then got in around 5 am. Was delightful.

We drove to Savannah today and tonight is Sold out I guess. Cool. I am so tired. I have been out for roughly 31 days and zi am feeling it. I am tired as fuck, but blessed to be tired as fuck. I am also starting to figure out how write while tired. I think this is great practice for when I get a writing gig. I do love the road though. Everything about it. The sights, the smells, the strangers, the peanut m&m’s, that feeling of wanting to go home, followed by the sudden realization that this has everything in my life right now that is important to me: My guitar, the road, the fans and me talking to strangers for 70 minutes a night hoping to maybe gather 30 new followers and sell a cd or two.  I am home.

Speak soon kidlets.  Oh and instagram your water. It’s funny.